Showing posts with label Loomis Chaffee. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Loomis Chaffee. Show all posts
Tuesday, September 24, 2013
God Bless You, Mr. Rosewater - Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. (1965)
I first read God Bless You, Dr. Rosewater when I was a junior or senior in high school, on the recommendation of a classmate. I have not read it since. I do not know why that classmate felt the need to recommend it so strongly, but perhaps it was because we both had something in common with Eliot Rosewater:
"Eliot had unremarkable academic careers at Loomis and Harvard. He became an expert sailor during summers in Cotuit, on Cape Cod, and an intermediate skier during winter vacations in Switzerland." (15)
This could hardly be the reason, but the fact remains that I have never read another book whose main character went to the same high school as me. And that high school should have been proud to put this book on its English course syllabuses--or at least assign it for summer reading for incoming freshman students rather than Clan of the Cave Bear. Because this book has a very positive message, and is much more fun to read. I'm afraid, however, that it might be considered "too racy" or "adult" even though it is comparatively tame.
But the book was worth reading in 2000 and it is worth reading today. Oddly enough, I could appreciate it more after going through law school:
"No one ever went out to lunch with Mushari. He took nourishment alone in cheap cafeterias, and plotted the violent overthrow of the Rosewater Foundation. He knew no Rosewaters. What engaged his emotions was the fact that the Rosewater fortune was the largest single money package represented by McAllister, Robjent, Reed and McGee. He recalled what his favorite professor, Leonard Leech, once told him about getting ahead in law. Leech said that, just as a good airplane pilot should always be looking for places to land, so should a lawyer be looking for situations where large amounts of money were about to change hands." (4)
This is how the novel opens up: Norman Mushari is a young attorney straight out of Cornell Law School working for a firm that represents an $87 million foundation headed by Eliot Rosewater. Eliot also went to Harvard Law School but he does not work for anybody. He oversees the foundation. His father is a senator, representing Indiana. Mushari hopes to have Eliot adjudged insane so that he may be removed as an officer of the foundation and that control may pass to Eliot's second cousin, Fred Rosewater.
The action of the book moves to Rosewater, Indiana. Eliot's ancestors founded the town, and he returns to set up new headquarters for the foundation. This part of the book details the breakdown of his marriage to Sylvia and the business that he carries out. He has a black phone and a red phone. The red phone is for the fire department, where he is a volunteer, and the black phone is for the foundation. The foundation essentially takes phone calls from anybody that is having any kind of problem. Eliot is a sort of therapist and philanthropist to everyone in town. The people of the town are often referred to as idiots.
In my review of Slapstick, I said that book bears a passing resemblance to this book (though Vonnegut self-graded that novel a "D" and gave this one an "A") and that a theme of that book was "extended families." God Bless You, Dr. Rosewater is a better book largely because its plot is not nearly as unbelievable. Yes, the plot is sort of ridiculous, but it is not altogether implausible that a person could be impossibly rich and feel that they don't deserve the money and thus go out of their way to help people less fortunate than themselves. It is a rather heartwarming conceit, and while I might label most of Vonnegut's novels "heartwarming," this might be his "most heartwarming novel." Eliot Rosewater is also one of the best characters he created. Rosewater shows up in a few of his other books, though not nearly as often as Kilgore Trout, who also makes an appearance in this novel.
There is also some clever commentary on obscenity. The Supreme Court was still trying to define obscenity in 1965, but Vonnegut offers his own parallel reality:
"The Rosewater Law was what the Senator thought of as his legislative masterpiece. It made the publication or possession of obscene materials a Federal offense, carrying penalties up to fifty thousand dollars and ten years in prison, without hope of parole. It was a masterpiece because it actually defined obscenity.
Obscenity, it said, is any picture or phonograph record or any written matter calling attention to reproductive organs, bodily discharges, or bodily hair.
'This psychoanalyst,' the Senator complained, 'wanted to know about my childhood. He wanted to go into my feelings about bodily hair.' The Senator shuddered. 'I asked him to kindly get off the subject, that my revulsions were shared, so far as I knew, by all decent men.' He pointed to McAllister, simply wanting to point at someone, anyone. 'There's your key to pornography. Other people say, "Oh, how can you recognize it, how can you tell it from art and all that?" I've written the key into law! The difference between pornography and art is bodily hair!'" (95-96)
The plot may be described as thus: Eliot gives advice to people who want to kill themselves in Indiana. This is the heart of the book and as such I don't want to spoil these scenes. But there is another segment to the book: the Rhode Island part. The action switches to Pisquontuit, Rhode Island, where Fred Rosewater, the son of a suicide, sells life insurance and is generally sad about his life. This is a rather strange part of the novel, though I could not quite call it a misstep. It just seems to get into a lot of detail about all the people in Pisquontuit, while Fred mainly exists as Eliot's potential replacement. Mushari is the villain of the novel (though sometimes Senator Rosewater seems like a villain, too) but the book is not about the plot. It's about how society reacts to a modern-day "saint"--is he a lunatic or is he the sanest man in America?
Like any Vonnegut novel, however, this is pretty light reading, and mostly fun for the humor of it. But it is still just as relevant in 2013 as it was in 1965:
"'Well--' and Trout rubbed his hands, watched the rubbing, 'what you did in Rosewater County was far from insane. It was quite possibly the most important social experiment of our time, for it dealt on a very small scale with a problem whose queasy horrors will eventually be made world-wide by the sophistication of machines. The problem is this: How to love people who have no use?
'In time, almost all men and women will become worthless as producers of goods, food, services, and more machines, as sources of practical ideas in the areas of economics, engineering, and probably medicine, too. So--if we can't find reasons and methods for treasuring human beings because they are human beings, then we might as well, as has so often been suggested, rub them out.'" (264-265)
In short, more people could stand to be like Eliot Rosewater. If they did so, the world will be a better place. This is why whenever I receive a phone call from some random person who managed to get my number in some strange way (like, for example, an extraordinary voicemail greeting I left on a phone at the City of Chicago Department of Law in the summer of 2012 that laid out every possible way to contact me) that I listen to them and try to help them as best as I can, rather than saying, "I'm sorry, there is nothing I can do for you." There is much that can be learned from this book, and even if you didn't go to Loomis, I think you will find it highly worthwhile.
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Negligent Infliction of Emotional Distress: Cubs Win World Series...Against Miami? (BLS in 2015)
This went up yesterday on BLS Advocate. However, this piece went through several drafts. The first draft was extremely inappropriate for several reasons--it is not something that I would want to attach my name to--it is one of the few times I would NOT vigorously support my own right to free speech. Thus I felt some editing was in order, and this was my second draft. My editor at BLS Advocate (who has been wonderful and who I will miss very much after this year is over--which is basically, now) thought it needed one more go through. So, draft #3 is on BLS Advocate, and draft #2 is on Flying Houses. Draft #3 is probably better but draft #2 is a more direct reflection upon the election, and so dovetails nicely with the post below. Enjoy! Or write hate mail!
By now,
the election is over. Part of me wants
to write before I know the results and part of me wants to write after I know
the results. I’m going to write now, an
hour and 13 minutes before the polls close.
I am
assuming that I am going to lose. I am
assuming that this race is nothing more than a popularity contest, and that BLS
students are generally apathetic about the SBA.
Only the SBA cares about the SBA.
The only thing that matters to the students is whether they will get
their free beer and pizza or not. Then
they turn around and say, look at the way the SBA is using their money. What a waste.
I ask a
3L to vote for me and she refuses and I say why and she says she has no stake in
this school and I say what do you mean you will be an alumni and she says I
don’t care I will never give back a dime to this school and I say why and she
asks me if I have five hours and I say sum it up in five seconds and she says
it’s a shithole. (And I will agree, that, when we don’t have wireless internet,
and we can’t enter our classes naked with a towel, it may be considered a
shithole [Ed. the latter complaint is based upon the events on April 16 and April 17, when classrooms were inexplicably hot to the point that students needed to get up and leave because they were going to sweat through their suits]).
If you
really push students to say what’s wrong with the school, AND BACK UP WHAT THEY
SAY, they generally don’t know what they’re talking about. Hearsay spreads like telephone.
People
seem to think I am powerless—one girl told me today, “you’re certainly
aggressive.” Well, tough. Live with it.
If we
don’t get aggressive, we’ll never get anything done.
So
what’s gonna happen in 2015?
I’ll
tell you what’s gonna happen in 2015.
I’ll be
gone, you’ll be gone, we’ll all be gone.
“You”
means current BLS students – whether friend or enemy.
The
school’s tuition will be, oh $52,000?
Maybe?
Most of
the same teachers will be here.
The
50/50 rule will still apply.
90% of
the class will be employed 9 months after graduation.
$106,000
will be the median salary.
The
time is now 5:01 PM and I’ve just gotten off the phone with a senior in high
school from Loomis Chaffee—my alma mater.
I told her, after an extremely long-winded monologue about my one-act
play that was banned at Loomis, the classmates at law school that I have from
Loomis, this election, and the election that took place my freshman year at Loomis,
that I would give her $20 on the condition that someone at the Loomis Chaffee
alumni relations department put me in touch with a chapter 11 attorney at a big
law firm in New York City for the purposes of an informational interview so
that I will know (since I can’t get in their doors through OCI) how I can
transition into that job in three or four years, so that I will know what I
must accomplish. I told her that if no
one ever got in touch with me, I would not donate next year.
If BLS
does the same thing, we can solve our funding problems. The school must make an effort to implement
this permanent solution to a purportedly temporary problem. If it does not, then BLS in 2015 will look
exactly the same as it looks in 2012.
Finally, let me say this: the Cubs
will not win the World Series in 2014 (or 2015 – the image from Back to the Future Part 2 is unclear) because
the Miami Marlins will not be in the American League. However, it is not for this reason that this
prediction will be inaccurate.
The prediction will be inaccurate
because the Cubs are a team that is fundamentally based upon the idea of
lovable losing and ridiculous drunken celebrations of victories that are
inconsequential in the long run, but oh so sweet in the moment. The prediction will also be inaccurate
because Theo Epstein is at the helm.
Theo Epstein is regarded as a wunderkind that will implement “moneyball,
etc.” strategies in order to win. Profits
will go up if the payroll is kept relatively low and the team is successful (though,
the Cubs will always be popular).
The Cubs are basically the same
thing as Brooklyn Law School. Except
they are a for-profit corporation.
Remember, Wrigley v. Schlensky, people?
We don’t want to put the lights on because we don’t see how that’s going
to increase our revenue.
Nicholas Allard is basically the
same thing as Theo Epstein. However, we
know less about him. Theo took the Red
Sox to their first championship in many, many years. The Cubs got Theo because they wanted him to
take them to their first championship in 106 years (most Cubs fans are in
agreement that Theo’s “system” will “pay off” in 2014). The General Manager of a baseball team is
like the Dean of a law school. You’re in
charge of building the team. The Professors
at law school are more like the coaches of the baseball team. The President of a law school is most like the
owner or controlling stockholder of the baseball team. (I am not going to follow up this sentence
with anything.)
I’ve taken this metaphor way too
far for my word limit. Thanks for your
support. Here’s hoping the world still
doesn’t suck in 2015 for the Cubs, and for BLS students.
Labels:
1L,
2015,
2L,
3L,
Alumni Development,
Back to the Future Part 2,
BLS,
BLS Advocate,
Chicago Cubs,
Loomis Chaffee,
Miami Marlins,
OCI,
SBA,
Theo Epstein,
Wrigley
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